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Release and Forgiveness ©

Readiness for Change
All human beings resist change until they are ready to change. It is only when we reach a point of readiness to change that change occurs. The indecision stage of knowing that something needs to change, but not knowing how, when, or in what form change will occur, can be a state of exquisite torment. The times of hanging in limbo, indecisive, uncertain or unaware of what choices are available; present some of life's greatest opportunities for change and growth or status quo and stagnation. When movement in a positive direction is achieved, there comes a feeling of relief. Change is often felt while it is occurring, but the how, when and what form is seen most clearly in hindsight.

        "Back there, I changed."

Mark Gilboyne taught me that moment of readiness for change is triggered during:

1 - Mental, emotional, physical and/or spiritual suffering.
        "I cannot tolerate this any longer."

2 - Hopelessness entering despair.
        "I cannot continue on like this and survive."

3 - Becoming aware that change is possible.
        "I'm tired of this. I must do something different."
        "I'm over this. There must be something more."
        "I'm through with this. I've outgrown it."

        I may see others change and think, "I can do that."

When the moment of readiness for change comes, the subject will steam roll you if you stand between him or her and the desired change. Some change is slow, like the growth of a redwood, but change doesn't always take a lifetime, a year, a day. . . "Be ye transformed in the twinkling of an eye" ( Paul the Apostle).

Process and Results
Life is rarely fair. Why does one POW come home having learned a foreign language, while another comes home shattered, fragmented, unable to reclaim a centered balance in civilian life? Life is intense, sweet, bitter, active, growing, changing, cyclical, chaotic and the only thing certain is change. Your goals need to grow and develop as you grow and develop.

Some people think that once they resolve one difficulty that is it. But Life is a series of tests and trials. When you first started breathing, your genetic lineage provided you with a reliable set of operating equipment in the form of lungs, heart, etc. You've learned a lot since then, developed many resources. Life is not a single result; it is a series of experiences and results or outcomes that comprise the process of living. When you look only to one result, you are forgetting that there is a process that leads up to, and past, any issue life presents you with. You are strong enough to handle whatever Life gives you. You have developed, are developing or will develop coping tools for anything that arises."

Decision vs. Choice
When the subject refers to a past decision, they imply that they decided something THEN, that may be limiting them now. There may be more choices or alternatives NOW. Decisions remove choice. Choice reviews for options, opportunities, open doors and horizons.

        "Take a look at the decision(s) you have made back there.
         Notice how it is affecting you today. Would you like to change your mind?"


Now you know where YOU ARE STUCK and IT WILL GET nothing but WORSE until you CH ANGE YOUR MIND!" (do closure patter and emergence) Yes.

        "How would you like to change?"

(Listen for the answer.)

"Using the adult mind, rise above that situation and notice the decisions you are making. Review that entire perception and experience and tell me, is that decision still useful, today? Or is it alright to CH ANGE YOUR MIND about it today?"

        "Is there any part that objects to that?"

(Yes. Establish a great debate. No. Do closing patter and emergence.)

        "Would you like to CH ANGE YOUR MIND TOD AY!?"


"How would you like to CH ANGE YOUR MIND!? What would you prefer to do, have or be?"


"YOU ARE STUCK, and you know where you are stuck. It will get nothing but worse until you CH ANGE YOUR MIND!"

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